Wednesday, December 31, 2014

Grindhouse Video [Tampa]

Some kind soul on The Facebook invited me to like a place right here in Tampa called Grindhouse Video. It didn't take me long to get off my butt and go investigate. Like most things in Tampa, Grindhouse Video is awesome! It is a small store next to a comic book shop/record store and a barber shop. What more could you possibly ask for? Mike, the owner, was there to tell us about the shop and be very friendly. He said, "How many stores can you walk into that are playing Fright Night 2? And on VHS?" Seriously though, how many? Now when I say it's a small store, don't think it's not packed with gory goodness. Here are just a few titles that I saw: August Underground's Penance, The Manson Family, Horror House on Highway 5, Countess Dracula, Faces of Death III, Graduation Day, etc. Of course, it's not all horror. GV caters to all your cult movie needs (including but not limited to screwball comedies, action, and kung-fu). Seriously. I highly recommend this place!

The Grindhouse Video Facebook page. LIKE IT!

Please note: I only photographed half the store! Not pictured: the Blu-ray section, the boxsets, and much more!

Monday, December 22, 2014

Doomed Moviethon EurocultAV Movie Party #1 - Pieces

So we tried this over the weekend with a double feature of Graduation Day and Pieces but alas, I had a migraine and had to bail. So we're trying it again. Doomed Moviethon in conjunction with EurocultAV.com is having a Movie Party. At midnight EST this Saturday (that's 11pm for you Central Time peeps), we are going to have a showing of Pieces. Where is this happening? On Twitter and Facebook! Where else? I'm hoping that we can have this little Movie Party once a month.

So anyway, start the film at the stroke of midnight (or 11pm or whatever your corresponding time zone may be) and we'll all hang out and get destroyed like a BASTARD BASTARD BASTARD!! Remember, this event is this Saturday, 12/27/14. Be there or end up in Pieces. The hashtag for the event is #piecesofgeorge so don't forget to use it and abuse it.

Links:

EurcultAV on Twitter

Doomed Moviethon on Twitter

EurocultAV Facebook Page

Doomed Moviethon Facebook Page

Monday, December 15, 2014

Doomed Show Presents #1 - Comic Books

In an effort to prove to you that we are, in fact, nerds, Brad and I recorded an episode on comic books. Since we are not talking about horror movies, we decided to make Doomed Show Presents, a little offshoot of the legendary Hello! This is the Doomed Show. Things like books, spaghetti westerns, TV shows, food, pirate stories, and old kites will be discussed in this series which we will do from time to time. If you like this first episode then "Merry Christmas!" If you don't like it then "Merry f__king Christmas!"

Hello! This is the Doomed Show will resume properly in the 2015. Jeffrey, Brad, Nafa, and I all have crazy ideas and lists of things we want to talk about in the world of slashers, gialli, and European horror as we are wont to do! So there you go! Have a nice week.

Listen here.

Check out the archives here.

We're on the iTunes.

Tuesday, December 2, 2014

H!TITDS Episode #61 - The Kindred

It's the last episode of 2014? Really? Yep, it's true. Our hiatus which started -like 2 months- ago is finally kicking in. We will be back in January (and if you're nice and not too naughty, there may be a special surprise from Brad and I in two weeks). But yeah, Jeffrey and I recorded our talk on The Kindred a while back and I put it in the "Rainy Day Episodes" folder until now. It's a good time episode, that's for real. Listen and write in to the show (doomedmoviethon [at] gmail.com). You should suggest a film for us to cover. If we haven't done it before, we'll totally cover it in 2015. Or just write in to let us know if you hate us!

Listen here.

Check out the archives!

We're on the iTunes as well. If you're into that kind of thing.

Thursday, November 27, 2014

Screw Thanksgiving, Here's A Halloween Blog Exclusive!

Back in September, I watched 9 Halloween films in one day. It was pretty awesome. I tried to have my video of me documenting this moviethon ready for October 31st. Well, I missed that self-imposed deadline by a mile. Hippopotamus! So I finished the video last night and I wanted to share it with you guys. I'm not posting this anywhere else until next week. No Facebook, no Twitter, no Friendster! So you guys who are doing some Cinema Somnambulist crawling today get to see it first. Happy Thanksgiving but really, happy Halloween...

Tuesday, November 18, 2014

Ann (The Babysitter)

My band GYROJETS has a new song called "Ann (The Babysitter)". It's about Ann (played by the lovely Ania Pieroni) from Lucio Fulci's The House by the Cemetery, my favorite film of all time. We're still learning the song so it's a little rough and it may get a tad different* but I thought you Eurohorror fanatics might enjoy this recording from last Sunday night.

*I'm going to try and squeeze an Oak Mansion reference in there somewhere.

Monday, November 17, 2014

The Gays

This might be the most insane trailer I've ever been asked to share. Work safe? Not unless you work somewhere amazing!

For more info, go here.

Now... The Gays.

Friday, November 7, 2014

Top 10 Post-1974 Gialli

Even though the giallo genre continues, albeit very shakily, to this day, I've always felt that the boom was OVER by 1974. I'm not happy about that but I find the gialli post-boom era extremely interesting. Some territories must have been craving bloody mystery films or else these films would have stopped forever. Here's a list that I threw together because lists are the essence of blogging.

10. A Blade in the Dark (1982)

“This is all the whiskey that you possess?” is my favorite line from a giallo ever and that alone lands this film on my list, even if it is the last spot. Lamberto Bava (or “Lambava” as Brad and I call him) really nailed this claustrophobic, atmospheric, incredibly violent, and wacky film. The English dubbing is gloriously cheesy and all of the female characters are weirdos. The score by Guido and Maurizio De Angelis is ethereal and haunting. What keeps this film so low on my list here is that it is definitely a little too long at 109 minutes.

9. Trauma (1993)

Of course, I already know that I’m going to be putting too much of one director on this friggin’ list, I A lot of people dog this movie but I straight up love it. Argento’s second attempt at conquering the American market (the first being Two Evil Eyes) certainly worked on me as a teenage person. I found this film haunting and thoroughly strange and in some ways it still is. In other ways, it is insanely stupid and melodramatic to the point of hilariousness. The whole bit about anorexia will have you shaking your head at this film’s clumsy attempts at tackling a serious issue. I’m not sure if I can recommend this film to you unless you are 16 years old and me. You have to be me.

8. Trhauma (1980)

This is a strange, slasher-esque, and rather obscure one that Brad recommended to me and I was glad when I finally got around to it. This one really gets under your skin and features some excellent disco music and oddball characters. You will probably be scratching your head just like I was by the incredibly abrupt ending. At only 78 minutes, you can’t go wrong with a bunch of strange dudes and gorgeous actresses being stalked in a creepy old house. I can’t wait to re-watch Trhauma. Yep, that’s how they spell it.

7. The Stendhal Syndrome (1996)

When it comes to baffling movies, you would be hard pressed to find one more outrageously bizarre than what I consider Argento’s last truly great film to date. I will never forget being totally floored and genuinely shocked by The Stendhal Syndrome when I first saw it many years ago. I went into it only having seen a couple of Argento’s films and oh man, I was totally unprepared for this insanity. An incredible score by Ennio Morricone coupled with intensely beautiful and wildly brutal visuals make for a wonderful mix. I suggest multiple viewings of this one.

6. Autopsy (1975)

Mindbendingly sleazy and obsessively morbid describe this piece of really well made trash. Mimsy Farmer, Ray Lovelock, and Barry Primus in a sicko love triangle that makes me want to wash my hands just from typing about it. Solar flares, mass suicides, dead bodies, an 8mm porn collection, a Death Museum, racecars, a pervert with a limp (a limp what?), pseudoscience, and undead hallucinations are just parts that make this a crazy whole bunch of crazy crazy CRAZY CRA- Sorry, must be those solar flares.

5. The Psychic (1977)

When it comes to Fulci’s masterpieces, this is Fulci’s masterpiece. As you probably have already suspected, I am a fan of Lucio Fulci and his gialli are very near and very dear to me. If you’ve only seen the director’s gorier efforts like The Beyond or City of the Living Dead, then you absolutely must behold this masterful giallo. This film is a death circle that just keeps going around and around and around and the music by Bixio/Frizzi/Tempera is some next level shit. You gotta get on this.

4. Murder Obsession AKA Murder Syndrome (1980)

Oh Riccardo Freda, you magical bastard! I didn’t even realize this was a giallo until my third viewing. There is so much gothic freakiness packed into this little gem that I was just bewildered. The more I watch Murder Obsession, the happier I become in my life. Anita Strindberg’s last movie? And it’s a doozy too. Fake bats, fake spiders, out-of-body experiences, a chainsaw, ghostly recordings, religious symbolism, Laura Gemser (not my cup of tea but you know, whatever), a Satanic cult, adultery, etc. Get off your ass right now and then go and sit on your ass and watch this movie.

3. Eyeball (1975)

When someone says to you, “What in the damn hell fuck is a giallo, anyway?” Show them this film. I can’t stress enough how important this film is for genre fans. If you only ever watch one giallo then make it this one. I’m serious. Umberto Lenzi made an entertaining, trashy (but not sleazy), and goofy movie that gets better with every viewing and is just fun to watch with giallo-newbs. I still prefer Seven Bloodstained Orchids but this is a very close second. Where the hell is the Blu-ray?

2. The House with Laughing Windows (1976)

Don’t even get me started with this one. If anyone talks any smack about Pupi Avati, I swear I will pull a knife and start some shit. When it comes to injecting some class into a classless genre, look no further than this film (or –sigh- Short Night of the Glass Dolls (if you insist)). The dread packed into every frame of this lush period piece never fails to have me on the edge of my seat. Art and the obsessive search for the truth aren’t just themes in this film, they are cosmic forces playing against the main character and it is a horrible joy to watch. Brilliant.

1. Tenebre (1982)

I’m kind of surprised to see this at the number one spot on my list. I’ve never cared for this movie. It is too sedate, too artless, too generic. Of course, I’m kidding. Argento got cold feet and decided to screw his fans out of a Three Mothers film (for 27 years) after Suspiria and Inferno by dropping this giallo bombshell on the world. If you wanted to say something to the effect of: the genre died here. Go on, you can say it. Argento straight up killed it to death with Tenebre. This film is truly deranged and over-the-top. Tenebre will trample you with style and leave you wanting more. I need to watch this again right now.

Wednesday, November 5, 2014

My wife is amazing...

LeEtta wrote a novel called Penelope Sea and Ocean End. She is posting it chapter by chapter on her blog. She also did the illustrations! Start here. You should check out her blog too while you're there. Do it!

Tuesday, November 4, 2014

H!TITDS Episode #60 - Delirium

Hey look! A new episode! That's right, y'all. This is the second-to-last episode of the year. New shows will be recorded and delivered right to you in January of 2015. But that's the future. What's in the past? Well well well, let me tell you all about it. Jeffrey and I recorded an episode about the freakin' insane giallo, Delirium. Listen right here, please. Be sure to get your fill of those classic Doomed Show episodes:

Dig on the archives, y'all.

Monday, November 3, 2014

The Halloween 2014 Playlist

Here are the movies, Halloween specials, and Halloween TV episodes that my lovely wife and I watched this October.

October 1st

- Rocky Horror Picture Show, Idle Hands

October 2nd

- Halloween Night Frights (Travel Channel), The Worst Witch, Sleepy Hollow

October 3rd

- The Crow, The Vampire Bat, Lawrence Welk "Halloween 1978

October 4th

- Halloweentown, May, Halloween Wars (Food Network)

October 5th

- Halloweentown II: Kalabar's Revenge, Halloweentown High, Halloween Wars (Food Network)

October 6th

- The Dark Hours, The Monitor, Halloween's Scariest Fright Nights (Travel Channel)

October 7th

- Practical Magic, Return to Halloweentown

October 8th

- When Good Ghouls Go Bad, Cursed

October 9th

- Addams Family, Agatha Christie's Poirot "Halloween Party"

October 10th

- Haunted America(?), Bewitched (movie)

October 11th

- SCTV "Zontar", Addams Family Values

October 12th

- The Witches, Mythbusters "Halloween episode", Cowboy Bebop: The Movie

October 13th

- Halloween Wars (Food Network), My Best Friend is a Vampire, Once Bitten

October 14th

- Most Terrifying Places in America (Travel Channel) 2 episodes

October 15th

- Most Terrifying Places in America (Travel Channel), DIY Haunted Houses

October 16th

- Hellboy, The Blair Witch Project

October 17th

- Mad Monster Party, The Corpse Bride

October 18th

- Halloween's Most Extreme (Travel Channel), Martha Stewart Halloween DVD, The Black Cat (Fulci), Lawrence Welk "Halloween 1975"

October 19th

- Beverly Hills 90210 "Halloween", Trick R Treat, Halloween Wars (Food Network)

October 20th

- 7th Heaven "Halloween", Buffy the Vampire Slayer "All the Way", NewsRadio "Halloween", Halloween is Grinch Night, The Halloween Tree, The Paul Lynde Halloween Special, Witch's Night Out, My So Called Life "Halloween", Don't Look Under the Bed

October 21st

- Blade

October 22nd

- The Fog

October 23rd

- Nightmare Before Christmas

October 24th

- Hocus Pocus, Elvira: Mistress of the Dark

October 25th

- The Innocents, The Uninvited, The Mummy

October 26th

- Party of Five "Wrestling Demons", Venture Brothers "A Very Venture Halloween", Paranorman, Scary Godmaother

October 27th

- Spooky Treats Unwrapped (Food Network), The Lost Boys

October 28th

- Buffy the Vampire Slayer (movie), Blade II

October 29th

- Hellboy II

October 30th

- Dylan Dog: Dead of Night, Cemetery Man, Buffy the Vampire Slayer two episodes: "Halloween", "Fear Itself"

October 31st

- Sabrina the Teenage Witch 4 episodes, Clueless 2 episodes, Newhart "Take Me to Your Loudon", Pumpkin Carving with Gordy Falk, Garfield's Halloween Adventure, Dracula 2000, Ned's Declassified School Survival Guide "Halloween/Vampires, Ghosts, Werewolves, and Zombies", Slumber Party Massacre, It's the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown, Jem "Trick or Techrat", Angry Beavers Halloween Special, iCarly "Halloween", Night of the Living Dead

Friday, October 31, 2014

My Halloween Blog Post

Well, holy crap. It's Halloween again. I had some content planned to drop today but my computer decided that it wasn't meant to be. Back in Semptember, I recorded a moviethon where I watched 9 of the 10 films from the Halloween franchise. I decided to pass on Halloween III: Season of the Witch because Michael Myers wasn't in it. I am a fan of that film but yeah, it was The Doomed Michael Myers-a-thon so parts 1, 2, 4, 5, 6, 7, and 8 as well as the Rob Zombie remakes were all in there. The video editing was going fine until my computer started crashing and I realized that I'm just too busy to fight and struggle and get it ready for you guys by today. Fear not for I will finish editing that video eventually and post it so you guys can watch it.

Check out the Freddy Cougar Moviethon.

And the Friday the 13th Voorheesathon.

One other thing that will pop up here eventually is my wife's and my October playlist. We have been keeping track of all of our spooky, haunted, and horrifying movies, TV specials, and Halloween episodes that we've watched this month. It should be a pretty massive post with all kinds of crazy shit in there. While I always wish we could have watched more, I can't complain too much just glancing at the piece of notebook paper that we've been filling up (front and back).

Just a quick note about the podcast: Thanks to me, Hello! This is the Doomed Show is taking a little break until January. I got really burnt out on editing the show and making it beautiful for your ears. We have two episodes and one special treat in the can so to speak and I will be dropping those on you every month until Brad, Jeffrey, Nafa, and myself are back in the studio recording new shiznit. The goal is to get something, anything recorded, edited, and delivered to the Podomatic feed in January. We have all kinds of good stuff lined up so you should be excited. We've been doing the show for 3 years now and that just blows my mind.

So that's all for now. I apologize for being so busy lately. Between the band, FAUXRROR, the zine, the podcast, the Giallo Meltdown book (still in the editing phase), various video editing projects, and reading lots of comic books, I am friggin' exhausted. My wife and I also bought a dang hang house this year so A LOT of time has been devoted to creating a living space out of 1949-era home. So anyway, I'm looking forward to 2015 as being the Year That Some Cool Stuff Happens. C U THERE, duders.

Monday, October 27, 2014

H!TITDS - FAUXRROR PROMO

Listen as Nafa and I do things to microphones that shouldn't be done. We talk about FAUXRROR and how it came to be. I make an announcement about the show. Be sure to stick around and listen to a track of FAUXRROR. It's called "Clown Syndrome". Enjoy.

Listen to the best 8 minutes ever right here.

Friday, October 17, 2014

FAUXRROR - Out Now On Goblinhaus Records!!

FAUXRROR (pronounced like 'Horror' but with an 'F') is a music project by my friends Nafa Fa'alogo, Zac Tomlinson, and myself. FAUXRROR makes music for horror films that don't exist. From Zombie Hitler to Vampire Ravers to Betsy the Bloody Harlot of the Brooklyn Morgue, we squeeze all the imaginary cult horror film goodness into every track that we can muster. Well gang, I am proud as hell to be telling you right now that Goblinhaus Records has released Fauxrror on CD! As an added bonus when you buy FAUXRROR, you get a free exclusive download of my new album called "Terror", my tribute to real horror movies! You know what that's called? That's called a DOUBLE WHAMMY, y'all! Here come the links:

You can get FAUXRROR here at Goblinhaus Records.

You can read about the fake films (FAUXnopses) and see the poster art (FAUXsters) right here at Doomed Moviethon.

For more spookiness, check out Goblinhaus.com!

Tuesday, October 14, 2014

Festival de Historias Extraordinarias de Terror

I found this magical little Mexican gem at a garage sale last Sunday and I'm just blown away by this lineup. So for 14 days sometime in the 1970s or 1980s, a bunch of lucky people got to watch the following films:

(If anyone knows what year this event took place and can confirm that these films are correct, please comment!)

Thursday, February 23rd:

The Abominable Dr. Phibes
The Oblong Box

Friday, February 24th:

Witchfinder General
Whatever Happened to Aunt Alice?

Saturday, February 25th:

The Curse of the Werewolf
The Phantom of the Opera

Sunday, February 26th:

The Night God Screamed
El Vampiro (?)

Monday, February 27th:

I Saw What You Did
The Haunted Strangler

Tuesday, February 28th:

The Haunted Palace
The Raven

Wednesday, February 29th:

Tales of Terror
The Masque of the Red Death

Thursday, March 1st:

Count Yorga, Vampire
The Return of Count Yorga

Friday, March 2nd:

El Sotano del Terror (?)
The Name of the Game is Kill!

Saturday, March 3rd:

The Thing with Two Heads
Scream and Scream Again

Sunday, March 4th:

House of Usher
El Regreso del Monstruo

Monday, March 5th:

La Conspiracion de los Vampiros (?)
The Crimson Cult

Tuesday, March 6th:

Madhouse
The Deathmaster

Wednesday, March 7th:

Cry of the Banshee
The Psychopath

Tuesday, October 7, 2014

Scooby Doo Gialli

Check out the friggin' awesome trailer that Jeffrey of Nessun Timore and Hello! This is the Doomed Show made for his article in the new issue of Fang of Joy. It's pretty damn outstanding:

Monday, October 6, 2014

The Vampire Bat

The Vampire Bat
Directed by Frank Strayer
1933
Lionel Atwill, Fay Wray, Melvyn Douglas, Maude Eburne, Dwight Frye
63 minutes

Someone or something has been draining people of blood in a small German village. The village council and its Bürgermeister (played by Lionel Belmore) are convinced that there is something supernatural at foot including but not limited to vampires and giant vampire bats. Karl, the police inspector (Melvyn Douglas), is skeptical and laughs at such impossibly superstitious suggestions. All he wants to do is catch the criminal behind the murders. His love interest is Ruth Bertin (Fay Wray), assistant to local doctor/scientist, Dr. Otto von Niemann. They try to get intimate during every moment alone they can steal but Aunt Gussie (Maude Eburne) is always cockblocking. Things get even more tense in the village when local nutbar Herman (Dwight Frye) is seen behaving strangely and befriending bats.

SPOILERS:

Of course, Herman is totally innocent. His only crime is being a frickin' weirdo and all that necrophilia (not actually in this movie, I was just seeing if you were paying attention). While the ignorant townsfolk are busy murdering Herman, the mastermind behind all of this blood-draining madness, Dr. Otto, is free to continue his quest for blood. He needs the blood to feed his creation: a pulsating heart that he has created himself. Small town doctor just wasn't good enough for this guy, he just had to go for mad scientist status. Niemann has hypnotized one of his assistants, Emil (Robert Frazer), into running around town, acquiring blood for him. Shit gets real when Ruth eavesdrops on him giving orders to Emil who is out on the prowl for Karl's blood.

END OF SPOILERS

What a revelation The Vampire Bat was! Full disclosure: I am very negligent when it comes to horror films pre-1950. It's not just horror, I am a tad impatient with any film that old from any genre. I'm just impatient with the golden oldies but I'm trying to get better. Every time that I stop being a wuss and check out something like, oh let's say, The Mummy (1932), and I am kicking myself in the dick for not watching it sooner. Why was I more open-minded as a kid? So ANYWAY, I should probably talk about The Vampire Bat.

Melvyn Douglas is amazing. His character, Karl, doles out some seriously unthinkable sarcasm. Every line he utters in that first scene with the village council is just ludicrously acerbic. Fay Wray is instantly likeable onscreen and is incredibly cute. I liked Lionel Atwill quite a bit but man oh man, the screen is stolen by Dwight Frye. This guy is just electric as Herman, the town crazy doomed to be misunderstood and ultimately destroyed by dumb motherfuckers. He brought a smile to my face from his first lines and I was super bummed out when his character meets his end.

One thing this movie has is some "comic relief" in the form of Aunt Gussie. Think of Una O'Connor in Bride of Frankenstein only fucking stupider or more dumb. I don't know who's aunt she is but man oh man, she doesn't die quick enough for me. Also, she doesn't die in the movie so yeah, NOT QUICK ENOUGH! This jackass is a hypochondriac of the highest order and she only seems to like hanging out with Dr. Niemann and Ruth in case she needs some meds. The more I write about her, the more my hatred grows.

I am glad that my self-imposed ignorance of old movies is finally paying off in that I have decades of old horror films to catch up on. My incorrect perception of horror films, especially from the 1930s was that they were clunky in dialog and plotting (which they totally are but I totally dig now (totally)) and stuffy (which they usually aren't). The camera is suprisingly fluid in this film. Some dolly shots combined with clever cutting make for some excellent sequences that are really eye­-opening given this film is over 80 years old. There is lots of spooky atmospherics to be found in this picture that horror fans will eat up plus the pseudoscience and the weirdness will make you nod knowingly or smile like a dang hyena (or maybe that's just me). Highly recommended if you haven't seen this one already (but your probably already have).

"Well, I don't mind admitting that I'm up a tree. Stumped!"

Friday, October 3, 2014

The Moviethon Vlog Episode #27.5

This is it, folks! The second issue of Fang of Joy: Eurohorror and Giallo Zine is finally ready for you. In this issue we cover subjects like Paul Naschy in Fury of the Wolfman, Blue Eyes of the Broken Doll, The People Who Own the Dark, and Frankenstein's Bloody Terror; Werner Herzog's Nosferatu; Pete Walker's Frightmare; Michele Soavi's The Sect; the George Romero-inspired Italian Zombie series; Umberto Lenzi's Nightmare Beach; the infamous slasher Pieces coupled with Sergio Martino's Torso; Dog Soldiers. Not enough for you? Good because there's more! This issue features an interview with Italian cinema master Ruggero Deodato and an interview with the German morbid-king Jörg Buttgereit. There's even an Essential Giallo Checklist- have you seen them all? Every issue comes with a free Doomed Moviethon sticker.

Want to trade horror movie zines? Or you don't use eBay? Email me: doomedmoviethon(at)gmail.com and we'll work something out.

Thursday, October 2, 2014

H!TITDS Episode #59 - The Torture Chamber of Dr. Sadism

When poop turns to gold, who is to blame? Hello! This is the Doomed Show, that's who! Or whom. In one of our "worst episodes", Brad and I managed to stumble around the insanely thinly plotted film, The Torture Chamber of Dr. Sadism. It is audio-tastic with words and talking. Check it out right here and/or dig on the episode archive for them class H!TITDS episodes.

Tuesday, September 16, 2014

Guest Blog: Top 5 American Horror Films of the 1990s

I like lists and I know for a fact that Brad of Hello! This is the Doomed Show and Yellow Razor likes- no, loves them too. We make lists together and here is a list now. Listy list. LIST LIST LIST. Since the 90s were so great and the horror movies from that era were better than any other era in the history of mankind, I thought we should talk about some American horror films from that era. And hey, why not put that discussion in list form. Here is Brad's top 5 and you can read mine over at his blog. Word up.

5. Dr. Giggles (1992)

Some of you may be confused as to the inclusion of Dr. Giggles on my list, even at #5. But this is exactly what a 12 year old undiscerning horror film fan loved in 1992. A good back-story, a weird, giggling antagonist, and a creepy hospital set piece delivered the goods. Yes, re-watching it doesn't elicit quite the same response but it's a good memory and it kept new horror alive for me in my early VHS rental days. I'm not even going to say guilty pleasure because I do return to it from time to time. And there's that scene. You know.

4. Event Horizon (1997)

This freaked us out at the theater and it freaked me out (not as much admittedly, but still) on bluray. What I thought was a sci-fi/horror film that would tip the scales more on the sci-fi side was actually far more horror than I anticipated. This is the closest we'll get to Hellraiser in Space (I know there's a Hellraiser in Space) even though most of us probably aren't looking for a Hellraiser in Space. Sam Neill + Black Hole + Hellraiser In Space. Number 4 on this list has been brought to you by Hellraiser in Space.

3. The Resurrected (1991)

This is a little gem from Dan O'Bannon who didn't direct nearly enough horror films in my opinion. Probably the best straight up Lovecraft adaptation out there for my money with a great performance from Chris Sarandon. Even though I think it's well directed it does have the look of a nicely made cable film of the time. This was one I half remembered for a long time before I stumbled across it on Netflix. Based on The Strange Case of Charles Dexter Ward it plays like a neo-noir that wandered into a horror film. Highly recommended.

2. In The Mouth Of Madness

John Carpenter's last great film and the only one of his that I've seen in the theater. My friends and I saw this and Event Horizon both and we decided that there was something very wrong with Sam Neill. And we hadn't even seen Possession yet. This is Carpenter's take on Lovecraft and it works on several levels, one of them being 'meta' right before that was trendy. Bravura editing and Carpenter's trademark widescreen picture plus Neill's slowly descending into madness acting and some genuinely squirm inducing effects makes this a winner for me. Do you read Sutter Cane?

1. Wolf

I think it's safe to say that from the moment the trailer hit television, we were all excited for what promised to be the definitive werewolf/wolfman picture. The chemistry between Jack Nicholson and Michelle Pfeiffer burned through the screen like no other coupling in film history. Years after his groundbreaking horror films The Graduate and Working Girl, director Mike Nichols delivered...Nah, I can't do it. I mean The Blair Witch Project is my number one film from the 90's, right? A masterclass in suspense and not looking the horror directly in the eye, opinion on the film is still split today. Released not too long really before everyone had a cell phone and internet and Facebook, the film delivers one of the last looks at true myth making unencumbered by post modern skepticism. You don't have to actually see the witch herself to be scared. Your brain can fill in the blanks. And that is terrifying.

-Brad Hogue

Friday, September 12, 2014

Franco Friday #58 - La Muerte Silba un Blues

Well well well, look who is back on the blog. Surprise! It's me and Franco! Or Franco and I if you're a grammarian. Since I haven't reviewed all 201 of Franco's films just yet, I thought I should at least try to do one more. Shit, it's been 6 months since I've been up for something new from Old Jess. But here's an oldie but a goodie from the man himself. Read on, my friends, read on!

Franco Friday #58
La Muerte Silba un Blues
Directed by Jess Franco
1964
Starring Conrado San Martín, Danik Patisson, Perla Cristal, Georges Rollin, Manuela Alexandre, María Silva, and Adriano Domínguez.
78 minutes

Part-time musician and accidental smuggler, Castro (played by Conrado San Martín), gets busted at a checkpoint for hauling guns and ammunition which he didn’t even know about. His friend, Julius Smith (Manuel Alexandre), also unaware of their cargo, is shot and taken into custody while Castro is shot as well while attempting to flee. 15 years later, Julius Smith sees Castro's wife, Lina (Perla Cristal), in a nightclub and performs "The Roof Blues", she and Castro's favorite song. Smith is run down by a car very shortly after that, confessing all he knows to the police before he dies. This gets the ball rolling as Castro returns to get revenge on Vogel (Georges Rollin), the man who ratted him out, profited greatly from the gunrunning, and even stole Lina. Castro, whom everyone believes to be dead, can't take anymore of this bullshit.

Vogel has been living under the name Paul Radeck for the last decade and a half and pretty much owns a small seaside village. A cryptic letter from Castro saying that he not only knows Radeck is actually Vogel but he has returned to take him down with his own secrets. On the case is Inspector Fenton (Fortunio Bonanova), he uses an undercover sexy lady named Moira (Danik Patisson) to get close to Radeck but her cover is blown ridiculously fast. Now everyone seems to playing their part in Vogel’s little paranoid game as he tries to rub Castro out once and for all. But hold on! Not so fast, motherfucker. More secrets and twists will be revealed before this story is over.

La Muerte Silba un Blues is an engrossing but very relaxed noir crime film filled with equal parts melodrama and style. The music by Music by Antón García Abril is vibrant, classy, and never dull. This black and white film features some excellent, creative cinematography by Juan Mariné. The composition of the frames and the lighting are just wonderful and I can’t even count how many of his shots are my favorites in this film. The screenplay that Jess Franco wrote with Luis de Diego is a little hokey but is intriguing and nicely nuanced at the same time. All of the characters, especially Lina and Vogel, are well written and multidimensional; and the cast is just so damn good that I was very invested in their stories.

When you’ve been watching as many Jess Franco films as I have and you've been watching them out of order as I have AND you also keep half-intentionally forgetting everything you’ve ever read about the man’s work as I have, well you tend to get surprised a lot. All of a sudden, the very first Franco Friday, Kiss Me Killer, makes perfect sense. If nothing else, Franco was The Great Recycler of his own works and he returned to La Muerte Silba un Blues for a reason: it is one of his best films.

The use of Smith’s song, “The Roof Blues”, to drive Vogel bananas works great. I love the way Vogel is introduced, lounging by the pool with the wind blowing around him, trapping him in the loneliness of leisure. The life he’s built for himself is all a lie and he knows it. The character of Castro, as portrayed by Conrado San Martín, is awesome. He’s just a happy-go-lucky guy with a whole dimension to him that I won’t spoil here. He makes friends with a black fisherman named Joe (played by Joe Brown) and these two actors have great chemistry onscreen together.

Now I won’t be returning to this to rewatch La Muerte anytime soon. Heck, I may never watch this again –because it’s just not my style of film- but I’d be an idiot to leave without saying how impressive this film is and how entertaining. Granted, this was Franco’s tenth feature length film so it’s not hard to imagine that he could have his hand in something this good. Of course, there are aome quaint gaffes like jump cuts and out-of-focus moments that became Franco’s signature to nearly all of his later films but honestly, you won’t care when you sit down with this one. The only thing I could find to criticize the film for is the damn disguise that Castro chooses for the big costume ball finale of the film. It is mind-bogglingly racist. Oh well, can't win 'em all, I guess. Keep an eye out for the director himself as a saxophone player near the beginning of the film.

“A dead hero is more interesting than one hundred mediocrities alive.”

Tuesday, September 9, 2014

H!TITDS Episode #58 - The Devil's Rain


My good pal Nafa returns to the show for some more Shatner-talkin' as we explore the Faberge TV magic of The Devil's Rain. This movie is nuts, there's not much to it, and it is infinitely crazier than it thinks it is. Can a movie think? Anyway, listen to the new episode RIGHT HERE or check out old episodes with Nafa (like Impulse or The Devil's Rejects) in the SHOW ARCHIVE.

Sunday, September 7, 2014

"Doomed Moviethon" by The Prople

I managed to get out of the house long enough to see The Prople live! I was able to shoot some video of them and then immediately crawl back under my rock to make them a music video for their song, "Doomed Moviethon". Apparently, it is about Doomed Moviethon! I can't stress enough how honored I am to have a song dedicated to my friggin' website.

More from The Prople right here. Like them on the Faceplace.

Tuesday, August 26, 2014

H!TITDS Episode #57 - Zombie Holocaust

Jeffrey and I get real, raw, but not indifferent on this new episode. Just enjoy the show!

Or else.

Please!

I am 9% certain that we haven't exceeded the bandwidth again. Listen here!

Check out the archive.

Read the Jeffrey.

Monday, August 25, 2014

Gun Help Is Help

My band's new video that we made. Not horror but horrifying? Probably not.

Tuesday, August 12, 2014

H!TITDS #56 - Argento's Animal Trilogy Part 1

We talk about The Bird with the Crystal Plumage and we talk about The Cat O' Nine Tails, directed by Dario Argento. Then the episode ends abruptly. What can I say? We were tired but the episode is pretty solid as we plow through our pages of notes. Our Four Flies on Grey Velvet episode is in the queue for upcoming shows so you'll just have to wait! Aw, don't cry.

Check out the episode.

Listen to our archived episodes.

Thursday, August 7, 2014

Soavi References Bava

I was looking up some information on Michele Soavi's Arrivederci amore, ciao and I stumbled across this clip on Youtube where he references Mario Bava's Shock. In particular, he recreates the "spinning bed" during Dora's (Daria Nicolodi) dream sequence. Don't watch too far on that Arrivderci amore, ciao video because I'm pretty sure the ending of the movie gets spoiled before the end of it.

Monday, August 4, 2014

38 Years Ago Today

I was totally born. Happy birthday to me. Here's some of what was in theaters on August 4th, 1976:



Tuesday, July 29, 2014

H!TITDS #55 - Satan's Blood

Why does that Satanic bird sing? Jeffrey and I find out once and for all. This movie is crazy and our discussion is crazy. This probably isn't the episode you play for your parents.

Listen here.

Check out the archives of the show here.

Monday, July 21, 2014

H!TITDS Episode #54 - In Person

Because we'd feel really stupid if we didn't do it, Brad and I recorded a brief episode of the show since we were in the same room together. How did it go? Fucking awesome! Partly because it is and also partly because we live 750+ miles away from each other. Check it out here!

Check out our archived episodes!

Friday, July 18, 2014

Road Trip

My wife and I went on a road trip for her family reunion. On the way from Tampa to Youngstown, we made a stop in Bowling Green, Kentucky so I could meet fellow podcaster, fellow moviethoner, and all around rad duder: Brad! We've been friends online for five years and it was easily the easiest, least awkward meetup ever. He and his wife are, not surprisingly, awesome people and I am super proud to call them my friends. The above is a photo of your Hello! This is the Doomed Show hosts under 4 or 5 stories of rock at Mammoth Caves.

Monday, June 30, 2014

H!TITDS Episode #53 - Eurohorror on Blu-ray

Brad and I return to the microphone once again for a freestyle rap but we forgot to rhyme. But we did remember to talk about Eurohorror films on Blu-ray. You should listen to this episode if you know what's good for you. And I know you do.

Listen!

You can dig on the archive right here for them old episodes.

Monday, June 16, 2014

H!TITDS Episode #52 - In the Folds of the Flesh

As if the world wasn't full of enough turmoil and strife, Jeffrey Canino and I just had to go and open up all those old wounds when we decided to discuss In the Folds of the Flesh. This 1970 giallo is totally and utterly nuts and you simply must hear us talk about it. Ohhhhhh, Nazisploitation, incest, and vultures and vultures! Seriously? SERIOUSLY!

Listen/download here.

Check out the archived episodes in your local area.

Friday, June 6, 2014

Moving Day

It's moving day! The wife and I bought a dang house. Shit is crazy right now. I will be back soon, my friends.

Monday, June 2, 2014

H!TITDS #51 - Best of 2013

Brad and I talk about our favorite horror movies that we watched in 2013. Our lists are all over the place. Fun episode? I think so.

Listen here.

Check out the archives for our old episodes.

Tuesday, May 27, 2014

H!TITDS - Episode #50 - A Candle for the Devil

Ladies and gentlemen, a bit of a milestone over at the podcast. Not only are we at episode 50 but this also marks THE TRIUMPHANT RETURN OF BRAD to the show. Holy poop! After an insanely long absence, co-founder of Hello! This is the Doomed Show, Brad is back. We get back on the hawg to discuss A Candle for the Devil AKA It Happened at Nightmare Inn from 1973. So much fun. Too much fun. Boo much fun. BRAD BRAD BRAD BRAD BRAD BRAD BRAD.

Listen to the new episode here.

Grab the old episodes here!

Monday, May 12, 2014

H!TITDS Episode #49 - Death Wish Club

Lookie! Two episodes in two weeks?!! Say what?!!? As a follow up to our Night Train to Terror episode, Jeffrey and I discussed its companion film, Death With Club. I put a lot of quotes from the film into this episode because holy crap, you have to hear this dialog. Take a listen and enjoy or just be confused. We were but happily so. Episode 50 is almost here, kids!

Listen to the new episode.

Check out the archives.

Tuesday, May 6, 2014

Akira Song

As some of y'all may have gathered from some of my posts, I have quite a thing for Katsuhiro Otomo's Akira in manga and movie form. Don't believe me? Well, it's all true. In fact, I found out that Sam, the drummer of GYROJETS, is also a huge fan of Akira. So we put our nerd brains together and came up with this little ditty. Take a listen and let me know what you think!

Thanks to Shawn for making this art for us: